Paramount released the new teaser trailer for Transformers: The Last Knight last night during Monday Night Football. The movie opens on June 23, 2017:
I mean, I will say this about the trailer, it’s a nice looking trailer, the effects look really solid, there’s definitely a different approach that this film is trying to go to distance itself from the previous films, there’s interest in a bout between Optimus Prime and Bumblebee, there’s a solid cast, this would definitely be something that would peak my interest to see this summer…
….HOWEVER, that’s exactly what we were thinking about Age Of Extinction and look at how fucking well that turned out.
So in other words, No. No, Michael Bay, I’m not gonna fall for this again because you tried to do the exact same thing with Age Of Extinction, you tried to make us believe that you were actually going to give us a new turn on the Transformers films but no, you gave us the same movie that we had in the previous three films except much longer and more boring. So, no, I don’t care if you have Mark Wahlberg or Anthony Hopkins in your movie, I’m not giving this movie my time.
I don’t care if your trailer is actually really impressive because you know what, congratulations on your graduation from the Roland Emmerich school of marketing movies with great looking trailers for shitty movies.
I don’t care if you made Pain & Gain & 13 Hours, two of the best movies that came out in 2013 and 2016, because you keep reducing your obviously there talents on films where you clearly do not give a flying fuck and make with scripts that have zero effort put into them.
I don’t care if you’re trying to win us over with scenes of Optimus Prime beating the crap out of Bumblebee or trying to impress us with your visual effects or your “different approach” for this film. Oh, by the way, we know that Bumblebee ain’t going anywhere because he has a spinoff film coming out next year so….yeah, nice job of cockteasing us there, movie.
I’m not stupid, I’m not going to fall for this shit again just to get my hopes dashed because you clearly made this movie as nothing but a cashgrab and to boost your ego as a filmmaker. I’m not going to get my hopes up at all, even with each trailer that comes out from this point on because I know you’re leading me down the path of disappointment and I ain’t following it. The rest of the internet wants to jump on the bandwagon, be my guest, but don’t say I told you so when I tell you this is going to be yet another failure and yet another waste of time…and this is coming from somebody who liked the first Transformers movie.
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