It’s 1991, the year begins with us going to war with Iraq and Kuwait in the Gulf War, a.k.a. Operation Desert Storm, the Buffalo Bills, the hottest team in the NFL, miss out nabbing their first Super Bowl to the New York Giants with Scott Norwood’s infamous “wide right” kick, the cold war and the Soviet Union finally comes to an end after 44 years, the long running television staple Dallas ended its’ run after 14 years, Michael Jordan finally leads the Chicago Bulls to the first of their six NBA championships in the 90s, Mario Lemeiux leads the Pittsburgh Penguins to the first of two back-to-back Stanley Cup championships, and the Minnesota Twins won their second World Series championship in 30 years.
1991 was also an exciting year for movies as well….but let’s look at the shit 1991 gave us first, these are the top 10 worst movies of 1991:
Sharon Stone in a thriller that makes no sense whatsoever, the script is all over the place, the twist sucks, the acting is terrible, their attempts to scare you are lame and out of nowhere, my god, this is a terrible movie.
9. Hudson Hawk
One of the most laughingly bad movies ever made, Willis tries his hardest to make this work but it fails on a number of levels, as a comedy, as an action film, as a movie altogether.
8. The Neverending Story II: The Next Chapter
A lackluster followup to the Wolfgang Petersen 1984 original, the villain’s main plot makes no sense, the story makes no sense, and the acting is really lackluster.
7. Mannequin Two: On The Move
That title alone sums up everything wrong with this movie….who the hell was asking for Mannequin 2?
A body switch comedy with Jimmy Smits and Ellen Barkin, should be good right? Oh wait, this is late Blake Edwards, his movies are not very good at this point in his career, well never mind then.
5. The Perfect Weapon
JEFF….SPIEGMAN…..need I say more?
4. Scenes From A Mall
How do you screw up a romantic comedy with Bette Midler and Woody Allen as the leads? HOW?????
3. Highlander 2: The Quickening
To quote Roger Ebert in his review for this, “what a title” and to quote Gene Siskel, “this picture cost $34 million? Where did the money go?” This is such a clusterfuck of a sequel, I bet all that money went to Sean Connery to come back for this garbage.
2. Return To The Blue Lagoon
Because we were obviously asking for a Blue Lagoon sequel, 11 years after the fucking original. Also, Milla Jovovich was only 15 when they made this movie…..so, this romantic drama between two young people, one’s 15 and one’s 21 where they have sex in it…yeah, you’re kind of watching underage sex going on here. Meanwhile, Brooke Shields in the original was……..14 as well…..and Christopher Atkins was 18, at least the age gap isn’t that shocking. But bottom line, who the fuck was asking for a Blue Lagoon sequel? The first movie wasn’t even that good to begin with.
and the #1 worst movie of 1991 is…
Cool As Ice
A movie starring Vanilla Ice as the lead and one of the most dated movies ever made…and yet, this director went on to do Inspector Gadget eight years later….good lord.
Now that we’ve gotten the crap out of the way, let’s talk about the best 1991 had to offer us:
10. New Jack City
The directorial debut of Mario Van Peebles and the first modern day crime film for the 90s with Peebles working off an excellent cast including Ice-T, Wesley Snipes, and Judd Nelson.
9. Career Opportunities
A great little comedy starring Frank Whaley and Jennifer Connelly in one of John Hughes’ last great peak comedies before his 90s lull.
8. Hearts Of Darkness
The most interesting look inside a director’s psyche, you see how desperate and manic deprived Francis Ford Coppola was to get Apocalypse Now! made and some of the crazy stories about the making of the film, there’s one shocking scene where you see Martin Sheen literally having a heart attack while they are trying to shoot a scene and Coppola just lets it keep filming.
This is some shocking stuff from the behind the scenes process of one of the definitive Coppola movies.
7. Cape Fear
Cape Fear is not only one of the better remakes ever made but it’s one of Martin Scorsese’s best directorial efforts, it packs on the fear, it packs on the tension, it packs on the drama, it packs on the great acting, and it’s just an overall enjoyable thriller. It’s definitely one that deserves a rewatch again.
6. Boyz N’ The Hood
The feature film debut of Ice Cube and director John Singleton and it’s as great as you’d expect it to be, tons of great performances from Cube, Cuba Gooding Jr., Morris Chestnut, Laurence Fishburne, Angela Bassett, Nia Long, and Regina King and it shows a great showcase of Singleton as a director.
5. The Naked Gun 2 1/2: The Smell Of Fear
Making a sequel to such a classic comedy is a tricky thing to do but I’ll be damned if the Zucker brothers made a movie that was as equally as good as the first movie, this was right back at the time when spoof comedy was at its’ highest with the Zucker Brothers, Mel Brooks, and Jim Abrahams were just making these continuously funny spoof comedies.
And Naked Gun 2 1/2 had a lot of the same magic and spirit that made the first movie so hilarious, the great humor, the great cast led by the late great Leslie Nielsen, everything that made the first movie so good is in this one and it’s definitely one of the best comedy sequels of all time by far.
4. Jungle Fever
A great Spike Lee movie to ride back on after Mo Better Blues was not up to the caliber that Do The Right Thing was, Wesley Snipes and Annabella Sciorra are great together on screen and the topical issues can still hold up to this very day.
What makes JFK one of Oliver Stone’s crowning masterpieces? Well, for one thing, it’s an over three hour movie and it’s never boring, the all-star cast in this is excellent, there’s a really solid mystery going on here, this is Stone at his absolute best creating a smart and enjoyable political thriller, and you just become so invested in what is going on, this is one of the best political thrillers ever made.
2. Terminator 2: Judgment Day
When it comes to Terminator, the two best movies are easily the first one and this movie. Judgment Day is a movie that was ahead of its’ time and still hold up to this very day, the action is great, the acting is great, the story is great, the music is great, the visuals are great, it’s just such an amazing, amazing movie, it is no doubt one of the greatest sequels of all time, if not the greatest.
and the #1 best movie of 1991 is…
Beauty & The Beast
I’m not even going to waste time talking about this film because we all know by now that it’s one of the best animated movies ever made. This has the best animation Disney has ever done, the story is great, the love story works really well, the songs are all well done, and there’s a lot of great twists and turns that work to the film’s advantage.
It’s a really great movie and one of the greatest animated movies ever made and one of the greatest soundtracks of all time, this is one that’s a must see Disney classic.
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